Production Blog

April 17, 2007

Nate Pellettieri, R. Emmett Sibley, Mark Munley, Production Assistant, Production Assistant, Script Supervisor:
For the Last Blog of this Run, the PAs thought it would be fun to do something a little different. We enlisted the help of Mark Munley, script supervisor and all round “Nice Guy.” He gave us 5 questions that were on his mind today and the exact length our answers should be… So loyal readers are you ready for:

Mark Munley Presents: South Park PA’s He Said/ She (really a he) Said Production Blog!!!!!



1. The state of California recently considered passing a law to make it illegal to spank a child under the age of 4. Supporters said it's a logical step the state can take to protect the children. Others claim it's just one more step towards California becoming a “Nanny State.”
Nate �" Against spanking
Rob �" For Spanking
4 to 6 sentences


Nate-
Hitting a child is NEVER okay! Violence breeds violence, and kids who are abused grow up to abuse their own children. Besides, there are countless studies that prove positive reinforcement is a better behavioral modification tool then negative reinforcement. This is not a case of the state trying to take charge of your family. These laws are merely designed to look out for defenseless kids that deserve a chance to grow up in a friendly and nurturing environment.


Rob-
My Mother had a paddle with “The Board of Education” written on it. She would beat me whenever I stepped out of line but hey and guess what… I turned out awesome. I live in Hollywood and work on one of the all time greatest comedies of all time. I’m now friends with Matt and Trey… best friends. Hey Reader… I bet you wish your momma beat you.



2. Knut, a polar bear cub at the Berlin Zoo, was rejected by its mother and is now being raised by the zookeepers. There was some controversy about whether it is right for a wild animal to be raised solely by humans. Various animal rights groups called for the zoo to put the animal down. The zoo, seeing a boom in attendance, refused to euthanize the cub.
Nate �" Put Knut to Death
Rob �" Raise Knut by humans
4 to 6 sentences


Nate-
Picture yourself being born into a life of slavery. Knut's sole reason for living is for others to stare and point while he walks around the same small cage everyday until he dies. He will never learn to develop into the truly majestic animal he is. It is absolutely horrible to end Knut’s life. But it is even worse to let him live.


Rob-
Would you want to kill “The Sexual Harassment Panda”? How about that internet clip of the little baby panda sneezing ( I can’t tell you were to find it because I work for Viacom and were are suing You Tube). I’m all for killing animals for food, fur or when they attack but come on. The Chinese don’t even eat them, I’ll never get laid wearing a panda skin jacket and last time a “panda” attacked me she just farted in my face ( to clarify, I used to go out with a girl who was nicknamed panda who farted all the time).



3. “There is a time and a place for everything.”
Nate �" Agree
Rob �" Disagree
Exactly 5 sentences


Nate-
Life is short, and to live with regret is to not have lived at all. You need to seize every day and live it like it’s your last. If you close your mind to experiences and events you may never know the true beauty life has to offer. Even negative experiences help reopen our eyes to positive elements around us. If you believe in yourself and others, never are afraid of new experiences, and cherish every day you are given, then you will die a happy person


Rob-
There’s never a time nor place when you shouldn’t feel free to watch South Park. This week’s episode is really funny. It’s about the homeless. It’s been a great run. This is the fifth sentence.



4. Several Los Angeles area hospitals have been accused of Patient Dumping. This is when the hospital pays a taxi or shuttle service to drive a low income, uninsured patient, usually elderly and/or disabled, to Skid Row to drop them off. It is a horrible practice that any human being should find disgusting. You are both to argue in favor of the hospitals.
6 Sentences


Nate-
When is one life more important then another? Is it okay to let one person die if it saves a thousand? These are questions that hospitals have to answer every day. None of us like to think about, and it’s seen as being harsh and callous. But, lets say you find yourself in an ER with a life threatening injury and they tell you you’ll have to wait for treatment because some old guy stubbed his toe and has no ride home. I’m willing to bet that in this case you wouldn’t mind if a taxi driver took the old guy home (or to skid row) for free.


Rob-
Shit Happens. Now that I work for the major television show South Park, I have health insurance so I really don’t have to care. I wake up, put on a South Park T- shirt and start my awesome day. Why think about patient dumping? The Blue Shield of California card in my pocket says that the only time I see skid row is when I drive by to see how good my life is. Plus, I’m not going to have sympathy for someone bitching about a free cab ride.



5. Is it possible to 'Love too much?' This is a free form exercise in which you can both share the same opinion, but you must use personal examples to support your conclusions. Points will be deducted if you mention a dead pet, or a paternal grandfather.
6 to 8 sentences


Nate-
Love is a wonderful and powerful emotion. It can give you strength one moment, and it can crush your spirit the next. But, when love becomes too great and consumes your life, it ceases to be beneficial. If my love for ice cream became too great and crossed that line into infatuation, then where would I be? If I spent every moment of my life lusting after a single girl, would that be considered healthy? Love must be revered and respected if we are to grow as human beings.


Rob-
Have I ever loved something with my all of my heart and soul… sure we all have. Some might say I love South Park too much. Well it’s given me a job, paid my rent, put a smile on my face, filled my stomach with free food, taught me how to be a better person, lifted me up when I fell down, helped me find places that can make a meal for 60 people in 20 minutes, told me to be a man, let me try wheat grass only to find out that I hate it, showed me how to wire money to other countries and taught me the best codecs for small video files. The Priest and Nuns at Our Lady of Peace (OLP or “Our Local Prison” yeah we were crazy funny back in the day) taught us that Jesus is Love. If you think you can get enough Jesus, you need to go back to church SINNER! If you can’t feel the flames at your feet, then you’re already dead.



This has been an amazing run. These past 7 episodes, in our opinion, have been the best since we started working here. We’d like to wish everyone at the office a joyful summer and we hope you, the viewer, can wait until September for the new episodes. Thanks for watching.


PA Nate,
PA Rob,
Script Supervisor Mark

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April 10, 2007

Michael McMahan, Production Assistant:
Rob touched on it earlier, and I don't want to repeat too much, but here's some of what made this week at South Park extra special:

- People got in a machine that swirls money around and grabbed at cash while a strobe light and deafening music distracted them.

- A man handed out freshly scooped ice cream sundaes to the entire crew, in the lobby of South Park Studios.

- The "24" family sent us a bomb with a thank you note. (see the pictures in previous posts)

- This week's episode went through a huge and hilarious overhaul today (Tuesday), the day before it aired. It now makes me laugh out loud in every scene, and most of it isn’t even animated yet.

It's getting late into the run, (this episode and then one more to end the season!) and people are starting to wear their fatigue on their sleeves. Staff members drift through parts of the day in a sleep-deprived zombie haze. Many of them end up in the kitchen, no real hunger having driven them there.

The kitchen has become one of those runoff traps in a pool that catches dead leaves and bugs. The crew lift their spirits a bit by grazing on the fresh snacks that are constantly replenished by us, the production assistants. (Snack gatherers have always been an important part of the human experience.)

Although the strain of long days and nights are starting to show, it isn't effecting the show. People are working harder than you, (out there in internetland), could imagine. Like weary farmers who know they have to put in the extra mile to get the South Park crop out of the ground before the season ends, they toil away.

Each episode is as good as, or better than, the one before. I know that I watch it in the office, over and over again, then I go home and watch it again and laugh like I've never seen the thing before. Something about sharing it with everyone as it airs for the first time lends a fresh humor to it. It's like how a movie is funnier if you watch it in a full theater instead of alone in your living room.

If you don't like this week's episode then go to a hospital immediately, because something is wrong.

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April 8, 2007

P.A. Rob, Production Assistant:
THE BEST DAY EVER AT SOUTH PARK!

Shrimp for lunch!! Ben and Jerry�s Ice Cream Sundaes for the staff!! Cash Grab Monday on Tap!! It was shaping up to be a pretty good day at South Park. But all that was nothing compared to the special delivery that arrived just an hour ago!!

THE HIT TV SHOW, "24" JUST SENT US, THE HIT TV SHOW, "SOUTH PARK", A SUITCASE NUKE! A SUITCASE NUKE!!!!!

Most of us are huge "24" fans. Let me tell you from personal experience, there is nothing in the world like running through the office with a nuclear device! NOTHING!!

Cell phone cameras were out in force. By the end of the day if you check any of our myspace pages you will see one of three different photos:

- A shit-eating grin and thumbs up next to the nuke
- Someone trying to disarm the nuke
- Me trying to have sex with the nuke, (yes, I am that big a fan)

Matt and Trey were blown away, (figuratively). They want to proudly display the nuke in the office next to the Emmy�if it fits. Everyone here was really proud of the "Snuke". We all feel honored that "24" liked the show we did about them enough to send us a bomb.

(Check out the pictures on southparkstudios.com's office photos page!)

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April 3, 2007

R. Emmett Sibley, Production Assistant:
5 episodes in… where has the time gone? It seems like only yesterday we were all summoned to Trey’s house for our bi-annual “Let’s Make This the Best Run Ever” Pancake Breakfast. Trey manned the griddle as Matt stirred the batter insuring the fluffiest pancakes imaginable. We have team building fun covered in syrup and butter, kissed with whipped cream. Those days are behind us now. Everyone is now working at the top of his or her game. If they’re not… well let’s just say they won’t be getting any pancakes next run.

After tonight we only have two episodes left. When those are completed, we will go on hiatus only to be punched in the face by reality. We won’t have a kitchen that’s filled with $150 worth of snacks every single day. We’ll have no excuse as to why our laundry isn’t done. Plus, we will have to explain to the government that our taxes haven’t been filed because we were to busy giving 8-year-old boys head lice and awkward homosexual experiences. I’m sure they hear that all time.

This week has been a special week. A “Morale Building” week if you will. It has kept our collective spirits from breaking under the obscene amounts of pressure we all feel.

How to build Morale at “The Park” (yes, I’m still using it):

1.Cash Grab Machine
“Like on the TV?” Yes Jethro… like on the TV. Everyone puts his or her name on a dollar. If your dollar gets picked you get to go in THE CASH GRAB MACHINE so the entire crew can stare at you as you grab at flying money while Andrew WK blasts over the PA. Trey also made up a new rule: if you picked your own name, you get $1,000. Congratulations to Nicole our big winner $1000 winner this week. Drinks at the 90 Lounge are on you!

2. PA Serial Number Game

Kyle, one of the writers here at “The Park” , it’s still awesome/ I’m still awesome, whipped out a $100 bill. The PA who came the closest to the serial number would win said bill. Simple enough? Ask Jeff “the Rookie”. After examining a $100 bill for 10 minutes guessed 9 numbers not 8. Congratulations to Nate, our big winner this week. Drinks at the 90 Lounge are on you! Stop giving drinks to Jeff… he just ain’t right.

3. Extra Days Off

What does someone who works 100 hour week want more than anything? Time off. Some have family they haven’t seen in weeks. Some have girlfriends that feel neglected. Some have XboX’s that need to get played because if they don’t THE ALIENS, TERRORISTS, AND NAZIS WILL WIN. TREY AND MATT PLEASE LET ME GO HOME SO THE NAZIS WON’T WIN! OH GOD I NEED A GIRLFRIEND!

The crew gets a little time off because it’s Easter. They work so hard and deserve it. Take that Nazis… take that.

This week has been great and it’s only getting better. The episode is amazing. It might send us all to hell but we will laugh the entire way there.


PS: I would like to give a shout out to my Mom. She just started reading our blogs. She says I’m the best; you know what? I think she’s right… I think she’s right.

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March 27, 2007

Mike McMahan, Production Assistant:
Hi, I'm Mike, one of the new production assistants here at South Park. This is my long blog.

I remember hearing about the PA blogs last year when looking for a new job, and reading them with wide eyes. It's a great way to peek over the fence and see what's going on behind a show you love.

If you haven't gone through the blogs before, I highly recommend it. There're tales of McRib eating challenges and lots of in-depth information about how the show is made and who is doing the making. They're written by PAs and Producers, and you come away with better idea of how it all goes down.

It's Tuesday night, the day before the new episode airs (Season 11, episode 4)and it's my turn to write the blog. I've only been here for a couple months, so I don't have any huge, earth shattering wonder-tales to bestow onto the blog reading public. Instead, I've put together miniature scraps of delight and interest- events and quirks I've come across working at South Park. Hopefully, by the next blog, I'll have lost a finger or impregnated PA Rob or something more newsworthy than the bits I'm providing today.

"YOU WANNA DO GROUP?"
Every once in a while there comes a time where a person will ask this question of the PAs. What it means, to someone who isn't "in the know" is: "Hey, do you guys want to come into the audio studio and record some background dialog for tomorrow's show?" The answer to this question is never verbal, always physical. Every PA within earshot jumps up from the chair and scampers over to the studio, giggling and chirping in anticipation. Inside we get to yell, scream, say lines of dialog and sometimes even sing while Bruce and Lydia or sometimes (gasp!) Matt tells us what to do. While the results never really get highlighted in the show, mostly it ends up being altered, mixed and turned into part of a huge crowd . . .there's something fantastic about being a part of the episode in a way that's more intimate than a lot of what we usually do. You can't hear yourself when you watch it, but you know that part of you is in the screaming crowd of lice as they run from the green goo. It's like writing your name in wet cement: I was there, and now it's permanent.

"YOU'RE A 360 FAN BOY,"
The PAs consist of three mid twenties guys and one 30 year old grandpa-esq hillbilly. Combined, we think about four things: girls, food, TV and video games. We can't help it, it's wired into our systems. There are often heated, intricate debates on subjects such as: The show 24 is good/terrible, the PS3 is better than/not better than the Xbox 360, the PSP is not a piece of crap, what we would do to various actresses if we won them as prizes, etc. I have more conversations about video games now than I did when I was 9.

PS: the 360 kicks PS3's ass hands down . . .and be sure to download our HD episode on it. RE: Corporate shill. And just for the record, Matt and Trey each play on every system you could imagine, Xboxs, Wiis, PS3s, PCs, on and on. So don't think the PAs represent the overall opinion here.

Anyway . . .

"IF THEY MADE A STATUE IN YOUR HONOR, YOU WOULD BE IN THAT POSE WITH THE THERMOSTAT,"
There are two temperatures at South Park: boiling and freezing. The thermostat is always at 65 degrees no matter what it feels like. There is a small path worn into the cement floor between the production office in the front and all the thermostats in the back. We love doing this. I want to have a small thermostat installed in my future coffin, so I can always remember these trips.

"THAT'S A BAD SIGN"
There is never a "good sign" at South Park. Let's say that it's Monday and there's only three pages of script officially finished. That's a bad sign because it means there's a lot to do before the show airs. This week is different, (I naively thought). We went into today (Tuesday) with the entire script done. "That's good news, right guys?" WRONG. It's still a bad sign because it means there's more time for Trey to decide that he wants a bunch of the show to be different. So really, there's never a good sign. A bald eagle could fly in through the front door, deposit rare, golden Cadburry creme eggs on every desk, and then do everyone's taxes while crapping "FREE PONY" coupons into a basket and it would still be a bad sign.

"YOU GO AROUND THAT WAY AT NIGHT?"
South Park's parking lot has many speed bumps. They're magical in that they often move. I don't know why they move, but apparently there are some places where two speed bumps side by side are more effective than one. Mostly it doesn't matter because we go up the wrong way at night, both avoiding the bumps AND saving valuable food-delivery time. I don't know why I'm telling you this, mostly because I hate the bumps.

"HE SAID IT WAS COOL, BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL HUGE FANS,"
When the PAs leave the office to get something for the crew we are the de-facto South Park ambassadors to the Los Angeles world.

All the PAs carry an envelope that's been laminated with packing tape. Inside are all of the receipts we've gathered while working, so that we know how much we need to be reimbursed. These envelopes have the South Park stars printed on the outside: Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman. When you pull it out at a restaurant or the post office it becomes a badge you wear on your sleeve that announces you're involved in making South Park. This is a double edged sword, and must be wielded with care. Sometimes it smoothes things over, buying you valuable time to get back to the office. Fans of the show will marvel, sometimes give you a discount, or just make sure that your order is being made with speed and genuine care.

Other times, however, you will get a 15 minute lecture about how you're going to hell for being a part of the show, and how you should be ashamed of the jokes that are broadcast. When this happens, you smile, agree, and hope that you'll get out of there without attracting more fury/attention.

I was most impressed when the South Park envelope enabled me to pick up some controlled medication for one of my bosses. The pharmacists behind the counter apologized for giving me trouble because they're all big fans. I imagine it's how ladies feel when they get free drinks in bars.


"HEY, WHERE DID YOU SAY SNACKS WERE AGAIN?"
The South Park crew gives more hours than you would believe to making each episode, and it's part of the PA's duty to keep the crew constantly fed and happy. One such meal comes around 9pm, when one of us picks up snacks.

Ralph's, a California grocery chain, is open 24 hours a day. We run over there and load up a cart to the brim with chips, candy, meats, cheeses, Jello, fruit, veggies, whatever. I imagine that the late night employees think we're stoners doing a Supermarket Sweep type munchy grab. WE MUST HAVE ALL THE PATRON SAINTS OF SNACKING! SALTY, SWEET, FRUIT, CHEESE, THINGS THAT ARE MADE OF GUMMY . . .

Once back at the office, you set up all the glorious snacks in the kitchen. Then, when prompted, you announce over the paging system the word "Snacks," wait a second and say it again, in case people didn't hear.

If you announce snacks any other way, you get to hear about it from the crew for the rest of the night. This is always a laugh riot.


"QUICK! SWAG!"
Ah, finally, swag. Also referred to as "shwag", although I think this pronunciation is a little dubious. In the depths of South Park Studios there's a closet that contains locked filing cabinets full of swag.

Swag is either any DVD or DVD set that has ever been released by South Park (or That's My Bush), and any type of doll, hat, shirt, clock, poster, condom, wallet, cap, calendar, mug, stein, button, sticker, patch, etc. that has ever been made with South Park characters or branding on it. Oh, there's also a metric ton of Team America posters in there.

We don't take any of the swag, just as one wouldn't pick up a chair or a computer from the office and take it home. The swag is a tool, one that's used in situations that need some sort of smoothing over or, perhaps, even a little buttering up. Let's say that Jesus Christ resurrected and ended up coming in to see what the place looked like. We'd probably hook him up with a doll of himself or something, just so he remembers us with good thoughts when he's out doing his other praying or whatever.

However, there comes a time when the swag becomes too much for its confines and a little pressure must be released, to keep the shirts and toys from boiling over onto the floor. Michael, (exec-producer Anne's assistant), will organize the closets and pull out a giant box of all the lesser, older, perhaps not as flamboyant swag that needs to be pruned from the hardy, stout swag. These swag remains will be left in boxes near the kitchen, for all in the office the pick over and take.

This is the point where PA Nate proves how much he's worth to us. He has a sixth sense about when swag is released from its dark confines; the hair stands up on the back of his neck, and as adrenaline gets dumped into his system he takes a moment to scream the words "quick" and "swag" in our production office before he runs up the stairs to the waiting boxes. It's thanks to his quick thinking that my friend Bob will be receiving a horrid Mr. Hanky necktie in the mail in the next couple weeks.


So there you go: things of interest from South Park Studios.

I know it took a while, and none of it's really going to be passed down to your children through legends and myths, but those pieces of working at South Park are things that I'm not going to soon forget. We do a lot of work in the office, and we spend a lot of time here too . . . it almost starts to become a camp-like atmosphere. Now we have toothbrushes for the late nights stowed away in the same place we keep our change, and every little thing is becoming a reason to make bets. It's fun, it's hectic, and when you aren't being screamed at by the lady at the post office it's a nice place to call "work".

Check out what all the snacks and speed bumps add up to tomorrow night in the newest episode, titled "The Snuke". Were there any PA arguments incited by Cartman taking over the role of Jack Bauer? Yes. But they were stupid arguments, so don't worry about it.

Mike

(also: much like PA Rob, I'd love to take play people on Xbox live. If you want to play me, and have a 360, email me your gamertag at mikethepa@gmail.com

You won't be able to play Nate the PA, because he thinks the PS3 is SO MUCH BETTER than the 360.)

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March 20, 2007

Jeff Urquhart, Production Assistant:
Hi Yall.

Jeff the new PA here.

Well, its that time of year again…. the NCAA tournament. A time when people around the country engage one another in office basketball pools. Now, you might be saying to yourself “You work at South Park. You do normal office things?” Of course we do. We’re just like yall but after being at South Park for a couple months, I’m beginning to think everything is “gay”. Why not the tourney?
First and most obvious, the tournament is called the “Big Dance”. Guys around the country are like high school girls getting ready for the prom. We call each other to see what dress..I mean team will win it all, what parties are going on and so forth.
If a team that wasn’t expected to do well advances into the next round, they instantly become “Cinderella”. Seriously? Cinderella? Don’t you think we could come up with a name that…I don’t know…isn’t a fairy tale about a peasant girl? Then if the “Cinderella” team advances past the second round, they enter the “Sweet 16”. Anybody? Can anybody help me here? Better yet, if said team gets into the Final Four, announcers have been known to say ”The glass slipper fits!” Gaaaayyy!!!
Isn’t that weird? A bunch of big college basketball players being compared to a blond girl who is turning 16, putting on high heels and going to a dance? Has anyone ever brought this up?
Anyway, the pool around here is up to $500. I’m already out for the most part, but it's been awesome. Being new and all, it’s a great way to meet a lot of the people here and secretly hate them for filling out better brackets then you. Maybe noticing the feminine side of the NCAA tournament will give everyone something to scratch their heads over….
Speaking of scratching heads, make sure to tune in for this weeks all new episode! It’s all about Lice and their tender yet vicious, mysterious world!!

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March 13, 2007

R Emmett Sibley, Production Assistant:
The best day of any run is when we get something for free.

Kurt, Matt and Trey’s assistant, will occasionally clean out Matt and Trey’s offices collecting boxes full of Cds, DVDs, Video Games, books, etc… He walks up to the PA’s office, a smiling 100 lb. Santa Claus and caringly looks into our sweet doe eyes saying “This is yours now, share…. I love you all.” With a wink of his eye and twitch of his nose he disappears having done his good deed for the day.

We the PAs take this stuff into a backroom: A “Lord of the Flies” style feeding frenzy ensues as we tear through the boxes. Elbows are thrown, friendships are lost. Mike the new PA…. well fuck that guy, South Park insurance will pay for his finger! I really don’t care, Mike, I’ve got those Slayer Cds and all the Xbox 360 games I can handle SON! STOP CRYING!

So, loyal reader, you’re probably sitting at home, drinking Mountain Dew CODE RED with that Costco case of Slim Jims saying to yourself “What makes this round of free stuff so sweet?” It’s happened TWICE this run and no one got killed with a large rock( 2nd reference to Lord of the Files - the only book in high school that I didn’t use Cliff Notes for. I’m trying to impress all the ladies reading this with my brain…. My Huge Brain). The PAs are all idiot millionaires now, rich with stuff Matt and Trey don’t want anymore. Don’t be jealous… Matt and Trey just love us unconditionally, give us free stuff and continually make us laugh with their edgy CNN approved humor. Yeah, CNN loves The Park, (I can call it the “The Park” because I work here and feel a need to be “with it”).

This week’s episode is unstoppable. As a PA I get to be the eyes and ears of the office. Today I overheard a 10 minute conversation about an eight year old’s penis and how, with this placement, it should be ok to air. I bet Brad, my accountant friend in Syracuse, can’t say that. Carry the two asshole and enjoy living in the house you just bought. I have free Xbox games and cool stories about eight year olds’ penises. So what if you have financial stability and a career that doesn’t involve getting Chinese food once a day? I rule!


PS �" I just got the Xbox 360. If you want to play Burnout Revenge or Gears of War online send an email to Piraterobotmonkeymidget@yahoo.com with your gamer tag. Are you cool enough to handle playing with someone from The Park?

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March 6, 2007

Nate Pellettieri, Production Assistant:
First the good news… South Park has two new PA’s!

PA Mike- (Nickname: McBacon)
Mike came to us from another comedy central show, Drawn Together. This explains why he’s so funny. While I have issues with him being a self described Xbox 360 Fanboy, he has thus far excelled in making fast runs, answering phone calls in a polite manner, and eating all the free food.

PA Jeff- (Insert banjo music here)
He listens to country music, he has a gun rack in his truck, and his wife might actually be his sister. Jeff joins us with a ferocity not found in most living creatures. Watching him break down cardboard boxes is like watching a Silver Backed Gorilla peeling a banana… Breathtaking.


Now, onto the more topical issue of racism at South Park… I’d like to address a few of the racist comments that people have taken offense to this last week.

“Fried chicken for lunch again?”
Before I heard this, I had no idea that food could be racist. Sure, I knew there were some groups of people that naturally gravitated towards certain foods like how Asians crave lasagna, and how Hindus kill for cheeseburgers (Insert rimshot here). But, I really didn’t think that someone could take offense to eating fried poultry.


“We like our brown friends at UPS.”
I have a problem with this statement being racist. I understand how you could take offense to it, but I believe the person who said it was talking about those lovely brown shorts the drivers wear. We all know it’s every woman’s fantasy to have Collin Farrell wearing those body hugging brown shorts knocking on their door holding a dozen roses.


“Wait… You mean you haven’t seen the hit movie Boomerang?”
This is wrong. This is just plain wrong…


I guess my point in all this is that people get offended very easily. Well, that and South Park is back…

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